sugar we're going down swingin' - robin hood season three reluca-watch picspam

[piecesofalice]

Once upon a time there lived a guy named, uh, Guy. Of Gisborne, in fact, and he loved this bird named Marian and it was like bondage happy-times all the time and they didn't know anyone at all named Robin Hood. They lived happily ever after.

OR SO I THOUGHT.

Apparently, once shaken out of my Season-Two-Finale-Daze by maddeinin and jesshelga, I was told it didn't happen like my brain tells me it did, and in actual fact? Lucy Griffiths is beautiful and out of a job. Really beautiful and really out of a job.

Oh, okay. Fine. I decided not to watch season three because I am cranky and a petulant child, but I was conned drawn back into watch it by maddeinin and her wily ways. With jesshelga because, like, as if I'm doin' it alone.





We open with - wait for it - Robin being emo.


He's running around being ~self-destructive~ and ~no-one can heal his heart~!!


WAHHHHHH I HATE MY LIFE WAHHHHHHHHHHHUUUHHHHHHHH


Thanks, Much and Little John. They're sick of his shit, too.


And they sort of reflect what I first thought when I saw Alan running around with them again, because, like I explained, I kind of blacked-out the last season's finale, okay?


Look at my scarf I was knitting whilst watching! Isn't it colourful? It certainly kept the whole thing interesting for me, especially with the lack of Guy. Where is that emo-tastic, eyeliner-wearing mofo?


Not that one, guyze.


THERE WE GO. Layin' around, angsting in bed about killin' his One True Love.


So of course, he runs outside to have a good ol' wangsty-emo-tra-la-la wrestle with his One True Foe, Robin.


...and runs off with a little girl. Uh.


He's about to throw her over a cliff, because he's a classy dude, when the audience remembers that something's missing!


...


THE HOMO-EROTICISM, OF COURSE!

Crickets


Well, it's pretty much back. And how!


It's back in Robin's tight pants!


It's back when Guy's angsting upside down!


It's kind of inherent in this guy who apparently had something to do with the plot!


And it's back in droves with everyone's favourite abusive couple that isn't Marian/Guy!


The Sheriff wishes to inform you all that he is completely above this bullshit and the coolest motherfucker to grace the planet.


Well, that may be debatable.


Insert tribute to Michael Jackson here via "anachronistic" clothing


Speaking of the wardrobe, everyone seems to be dressed by The Sofa King.


Your specialist for tassels and the finest Italian leather!


There is a plot, something to do with Robin's awesome return thanks to Friar Tuck and an eclipse. Huh. Speaking of that GQMF -


Tuck says "LOL" and possibly is wondering how to get out of his BBC contract.


In other news, Guy busts a move.


He also has swords pointed at him, and begs for death WAAAHHHHHHHH


Gets swords swiped along his cheek in an erotic way, whilst begging for death WAHHHHH


As well as pointing swords and begging for death WAHHHHHHHHH


And has more swords pointed at him, but instead of begging for death etc, pwnz the Sheriff and is a bad doggie, no biscuit (although Sheriff is both curious and aroused by this development).


All while rockin' the latest in Middle Ages hair fashion.


Because he's worth it!


Finally, he yells in frustration and begging-for-death-WAHHHH-ness.


A lot.


Then Robin buries Marian's ring. No, Robin, planting a piece of jewellery won't grow a Ring Tree.


I'm sorry. It's just basic botanical science, boyo!

~THE END~

And then, because I'm a masochist and probably have drunk too much coffee thus am awake for the next seventeen days, I watched the second episode, too. It included:


A character with GASP lady-bits who was WTF feisty and zany and TOUGH and OMG.


She's not like Marian, okay? She has a zany braid and shit!

crickets

The episode also included:


Guy yelling some more!


The Boondock Saints!


This unappealing douchebag!


Eyeliner even Pete Wentz is jealous of!


Caps that can be taken really far out of context!


Highly-unlikely "anachronistic" flying scenes!


Cries of "OH FFS JUST DO IT YOU TWO"!


The lastest from The Sofa King's capsule collection, Fabio's Fabulous Frockings!


And ending, naturally, on Guy being dragged somewhere while yelling and his hair flying whilst begging for death WAHHHHH or something.

Oh, Season Three.


Don't even say it. Lepers!

*does eighteen shots in a row*



Next time on "Emo! Emo! Emo!', Robin tries to act and Guy washes his hair. Maybe.

_{I miss Marian.}

Comments

[maddeinin.livejournal.com]

OH YOU ARE A MUCH MUCH BETTER PERSON THAN ME. All I am managing in reaction is SHUT UP SHUT UP SHUT UP ROBIN.

I am watching episode three right now and IT HAS NO GUY. However, the Sheriff is being extremely entertaining, so I don't even care (that much), except to note that if we don't get to see him (Guy) being tortured by Prince John (played by Toby Stephens!!eleventy!) in ep four I'm going to be VERY PUT OUT.

The more I see of season three, the more I miss season two. WOE.

[piecesofalice.livejournal.com]

I thought I was pretty good at keeping my absolute, eye-twitchingly epic dislike for Robin out of this post. But I think it may come out IF I HAVE TO WATCH AN ENTIRE EPISODE WITHOUT GUY AS A REWARD ESPECIALLY TOBY STEVENS-TORTURED GUY >:O

*twitch*

I want to like Kate. But she's not Marian. :(

And can we talk about Tuck and his Hallmark card-esque lines?

[maddeinin.livejournal.com]

I was all set to like Tuck, but then he outed himself as a Robin fanboy and now he makes me twitch. I wish RH was the kind of show where you could assume his platitudes were flat on purpose, but HAHAHA NO. Also he gets to chew a lot of scenery in episode four because of Religion.

[piecesofalice.livejournal.com]

DUDE. There isn't enough scenery left! Guy ate it all!

I wish he spoke in haikus.

Robin is the best
Our saviour in tight, tight pants
Look at his emo angst!

Oh, Guy. Somewhere, Richard Armitage is cutting his hair and thanking Gods and making out with Lucy Griffiths and being good looking on Spooks.

[jesshelga.livejournal.com]

except to note that if we don't get to see him (Guy) being tortured by Prince John (played by Toby Stephens!!eleventy!) in ep four I'm going to be VERY PUT OUT.

Be prepared to be put out, man.

[maddeinin.livejournal.com]

WELL THAT JUST SUCKS.

I'm going to watch it now anyway. I'm on a roll here.

[jesshelga.livejournal.com]

Next time on "Emo! Emo! Emo!', Robin tries to act and Guy washes his hair. Maybe.

Well, one of those things is right.

I kind of hate both you and maddeinin for this. I'm now SO curious about the spoilerized ending and the promise of Toby Stephens as Prince John...and yet my hatred of Robin Hood has reached such epic heights that every little thing he does is SO the opposite of magic that I want to spazz out.

[maddeinin.livejournal.com]

I'm sorry! So sorry! I will never do this to you again, I swear (mostly because despite their setting up a Gary Stu to take over, the show was canceled. I think. If it wasn't... I'm probably going to do this to you again.)

I've seen an episode with Prince John and Toby Stephens will NOT DISAPPOINT. NO REALLY I MEAN IT. He will make everything worth it! Well, at least the scenes he's in. And then Guy's sister is pretty awesome aside from falling for Robin and then getting shafted at every opportunity.

[piecesofalice.livejournal.com]

I'm hanging my head in shame right now. Hangin' it good.

Halfway through episode two I think something in the back part of my brain snapped, and I stopped seeing Robin as "annoying" and more "deleted from existence oh why is there a big void in this scene huh".

I am afraid if I ever met Jonas Armstrong I'd punch him. In his smug little douche face.

[firthgal.livejournal.com]

Oh, this was awesome. I especially loved Fabio's Fabulous Frockings. I watched the first ep ages ago, but... it was so flipping ridiculous that I couldn't stand to watch anymore eps. I will just have to depend on your highly informative picspams to keep me in the Robin Hood loop.

[piecesofalice.livejournal.com]

See, this is a service I offer you all as my Flist.

piecesofalice - watchin' the crap so you don't have to since 2005!!

[atlashrugged.livejournal.com]

I have never watched this show and STILL Robin annoys me SO MUCH. It's weird.

The fake hair advert. made me LOL inappropriately. Sadly, it looks similar to my hair. On second look, mine is better, but still.

[piecesofalice.livejournal.com]

Not weird. Completely rational and, in fact, shows you are a very intelligent woman and should be rewarded.

He's like watching a reality television star try to act. Or something.

[dear-prudence.livejournal.com]

I LOLED.

[nixwilliams.livejournal.com]

I AM SO, SO HAPPY THAT YOU ARE DOING THIS BRAVE WORK FOR THE PUBLIC GOOD. if - if - i ever watch this season, i will at least have your picspam as the original to fall back on when it disappoints.

P.S. is robin going bald at the front? SHOCK.

P.P.S. is that guy who had something to do with the plot actually murray from flight of the conchords? because that would be excellent.

[piecesofalice.livejournal.com]

I thought it was Murray, too! But it's actually this fine bloke (http://www.imdb.com/name/nm0743605/), who you may remember from Life on Mars and other programs.

(And I do what I can to save you all from the terrible inevitability of, erm, terribleness that is Robin Hood-sans Marian. To quote suburbannoir, "how can you have Robin Hood without Marian?!")

[sajee.livejournal.com]

OK:

1. LOL IRL

2. Jonas is looking rough.

3. Unrelated Morgana-icon is kickarse.

[piecesofalice.livejournal.com]

The first thing I thought when I read "Jonas is looking rough" was "LOL TOO MANY BACARDI BREEZERS", and then "LOL JONAS I WONDER IF HE HAS BROTHERS".

Bacardi Breezers!? He must be a sixteen year old girl in my head, then?

(Morgana should say HI to Derby!Juliet and they can kick-ass togethz)