piecesofalice

Ever get one of those fic bunnies that will never leave you alone, until you write it in desperation on a Sunday night? RPF, completely platonic, about two TV hosts who don't really know each other and are bonded only by a love of food?

No? Oh. Uh. Here, have a fic!

TITLE: Take It Off Your Mind
FANDOM: Top Chef (Padma Lakshmi & Tom Colicchio)
RATING: G
DISCLAIMER: These are real people. I do not own them, natch.

( They're stuck in New York, and it's raining. )

BFFs. Totes.

Man, I dunno what the hell this is. The last discharge before my writer's block breaks? A love song to Platonic Detective Partnerz? My clavicle fetish exposed? Whatever.

TITLE: The Collarbone Press
FANDOM: Life, Dani Reese and Charlie Crews
RATING: PG, for a bit of swearing.
DISCLAIMER: Really. Not mine, I promise.

( Sometimes she forgets to breathe, and her chest seems to become heavier than she thinks she can handle. )

Tidwell's hair is greasy, y'all.

I'm watching I Was a Male War Bride at the moment, and there's a scene where Ann Sheridan and Cary Grant are bickering while she's in bed and he's giving her a (very bad) neck massage before she conks out and he (comically) tries to sleep in a chair. Then he wakes up in agony, hops into the bed next to her and she wakes up, chucking a fit before they LOLariously bicker each other to death - and lurve.

It's something I can imagine Juliet and Lassiter doing, and I wish, oh how I wish, I was writing Psych. But, like the most obvious of obvious statements, I'm not - so here. Have some cliche fic (and I promise I'm done spamming with ridiculous squealing for tonight).

TITLE: Four Times Carlton Lassiter & Juliet O'Hara Pretended To Be Married (And One Time They Had To Make-Out To Distract A Perp)
FANDOM: Psych, Juliet O'Hara/Carlton Lassiter
RATING: M-ish, for kissage.
DISCLAIMER: Steve Franks own them. You know it'd be old Hollywood rom-com, all the time under my reign.

( On the contrary. )

I love cliche fic. It flows through my veins like love!

EDIT: VDO and William Fichtner being hot and mean partners who get handcuffed together in Strange Days? YSPLS.

EDIT 2: And then VDO ( spoiler spoilerton ) YEAH STRANGE DAYS, YOU'RE THE BOMB. And, ugh. Still one of the best OTP ending scenes ever. Makes me bawl everytime, loser I am. Bless.

Was going to post this tomorrow, then I remembered I had STOCKTAKE UGH, thus wouldn't have time, thus you get two posts. Lucky!

As for this monstrosity? Shut the hell up, Dani/Marshall is the new OTP. Represent!

TITLE: Traffic Lights
FANDOM(S): Dani Reese/Marshall Mann (Life and My Name is Marshall In Plain Sight)
RATING: PG or WTF
DISCLAIMER: Not mine, whoevers

( Her father hated the way he touched her leg under the table. )

They're just like Christmas, I swear!

Hawksley's got a new album, and one of the tracks made me think of those poor, unfortunate male souls that are a part of my OTPs. Hey, you've gotta kiss a lot of pidgeons before you get a swan, fellas.

TITLE: Kissing Girls You Shouldn't Kiss
FANDOM(S): Charlie Crews (Life), Carlton Lassiter (Psych), Bobby Goren (Criminal Intent), Roman (Life), Tommy Lynley (The Inspector Lynley Mysteries)
RATING: A nice solid M
DISCLAIMER: None of these characters are mine.

( What time is is now? )

Two posts? Can you imagine!

TITLE: All The Little Things
FANDOM: Psych, Juliet/Lassiter
RATING: M, whatev
DISCLAIMER: Steve Frank's, not mine, whatev

( His hand was shaking. )


I'm so glad The Cheat is not dead. Where'd this choir come from?

I blame hormones and a lack of new episodes/the general consensus they're an old married couple. Bebbehs are CUTE.

TITLE: From The Circus to Conception in One Easy Step
FANDOM: Psych, Juliet/Lassiter
RATING: PG for Baby Fic and Fluffiness
DISCLAIMER: Not not mine. Steve Frank-bank's.

( There’s that moment in a woman’s life when the switch is clicked and your feet are swollen and absolute fear overtakes every fibre of your being. )

Guys guys that was so sweet. I wish we didn't have to wait until like, September.

TITLE: In Sickness
FANDOM: Psych, Juliet/Lassiter
RATING: PG, totes
DISCLAIMER: Not mine. Less Roday = my show.

( The first time Carlton Lassiter called in sick to work, Juliet O’Hara peered out the window of the Santa Barbara Police Department to see if the Apocalypse had come. )

Christmas present post number three: aj, come on down!

She wanted Barbara and Tommy from The Inspector Lynley Mysteries at home. And I, being a Santa Claus-type (sans beard and red suit), obliged.


TITLE: Salvation By Ordinary Objects
FANDOM: The Inspector Lynley Mysteries, Tommy/Barbara
RATING: PG. It's Christmas!
DISCLAIMER: Not-not mine, not-not mine.


( 'Did you take the video back?' )

Now I unpack my bag and think of horrible work tomorrow, all while wearing a t-shirt and shortie underpants. Sigh. Merry Christmas, A.j.!

I saw an old, white lady dressed in full Indian Bollywood attire on the platform opposite mine today, at the train station. The first thing that came into my head was "One day."

What? My subconcious thinks I'm going to be a crazy faux-Bollywood star? Whatev, brain. Ev.

Anyway, here, have some Ted fic I've been writing on my way home.


TITLE: Where Handshakes Are Shared by Strangers
FANDOM: Life, Ted fic
RATING: PG. There's some drug use, but we're all grown ups here.
DISCLAIMER: Not mine. That dude's.


( 'Do you really have a jet?' )

Next time: Ted reads People magazine and dances a jig!